Bill Handel

Bill Handel

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This Cop Was Crappy!

Here we have the tale of Matt Luckhurst, a police officer in San Antonio, Texas.Luckhurst was under fire for something he did on the job, but will keep his job after an arbitrator overturned his firing.

So what did he do? He allegedly gave a sandwich made from feces to a homeless man.

Some context: A large group of homeless people had set up an encampment in a parking lot. The parking lot had clearly posted “No Trespassing” signs. The police were sent to clear the homeless folks out.

As this was happening, Officer Luckhurst was trying to get the homeless people to help clean up some of the garbage that had accumulated. His side of the story is that he saw some dog feces, used a discarded piece of bread to pick it up, and then threw it into a trash receptacle near a homeless man. Luckhurst says it never even occurred to him that anyone would think it was anything other than trash.

The thing is, though, that Luckhurst then told two other officers what had happened, and was laughing about it. The other cops were reportedly horrified, but didn’t report what had happened right away. That turned the incident into a kind of urban legend, with people all over the department passing along their version. The details changed and changed again, until almost nobody could be certain what had really happened.

What is certain, because even Luckhurst agrees, is that he put a feces sandwich next to a homeless person. Apparently, nobody can find any video footage to shed more light on how this went down (gross wordplay, I know). If the homeless man had gotten sick from eating any of the sandwich, the city could easily have been sued. So they fired Luckhurst. He prevailed on appeal.Luckhurst will not lose his job over this. He is not out of the woods yet, however, because another feces related incident may still get him fired.

The accusation is that Luckhurst and another officer defecated in the women’s restroom at the station and didn’t flush on purpose. They then allegedly smeared some other brown substance on the seat, to fool the ladies into thinking the seat was covered in poop.

So Luckhurst could still see his career in law enforcement flushed away.

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