The Pattern Of Lying Parents - With The Dad Podcast

Do you lie to your kids?

Big lies?

Little lies?

Well, did you know that telling your kids lies makes them more likely to lie to their kids as an adult? According to a study outlined in Science Daily, kids that are lied to are also more likely to be disruptive, experience conduct problems, guilt and shame, and selfish and manipulative character.

Assistant Professor Setoh Peipei from NTU Singapore's School of Social Sciences was the lead author of the study.

"Parenting by lying can seem to save time especially when the real reasons behind why parents want children to do something is complicated to explain. When parents tell children that 'honesty is the best policy', but display dishonesty by lying, such behavior can send conflicting messages to their children. Parents' dishonesty may eventually erode trust and promote dishonesty in children."

Justin Worsham of The Dad Podcast has experienced this in his own life.

"My therapist once suggested lying to my kids and it is the only advice that he gave that I have not listened to. I think it has a lot to do with my dad’s transparency with me. I never felt traumatized by his honesty about sex, money, relationships, and death as a kid. And as an adult I have found it to be refreshing and helpful. And it is completely understandable that if you model behavior of honesty that your kids are more likely to be honest. But one of the many things I have found interesting about this article is that I have been honest with my kids and yet my younger son has been known to lie or bend the truth to benefit himself. But I would argue that bending the truth is common for kids."

 

To hear more of Justin's take on the pattern of lying parents and other parenting topics, you can check out all of his stuff at The Dad Podcast.

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