You have a full-time job.
You own a home.
You have children.
You are a grown adult.
Yet, when you're around your parents and the rest of your family, you instantly become the same person you were when you went out on your own.
Why?
It's a little thing called family systems theory. According to The New York Times, this basically says that every person has a very specific role within the family dynamic, so when everyone gets back together, regardless of how long they've been apart, they will regress back to the way they all functioned when they lived as a family unit.
Do you know what comes along with that?
Criticism.
Do you know how well adults handle being criticized by their parents?
Not well. Not well at all.
Justin Worsham of The Dad Podcast thinks this may land a bit more on the kid than it does the parent, though.
"One time I was talking about my worries as a parent to a friend who, at the time, did not have kids. He said to me 'You know you already screwed them up right?!' He then went on to explain that everyone has at least one thing that they didn’t like about their parents. It’s interesting to me that this article talks about how you shouldn’t criticize your children. Maybe I am misunderstanding the intent, but I am not sure how you can parent (especially older) kids without criticism."
To hear more of Justin's take on relationships between adult children and their parents, and other parenting topics, you can check out all of his stuff at The Dad Podcast.